Cravings…?

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There’s something scarily addicting in these Clif Bars… drugs maybe? That’s all I have eaten for the past week. Target only has the White Chocolate Macadamia Nut though. I want to try something with caramel? I’ve also been having a lot of caramel lately. And pickles. Geez, my cravings are worse than pregnant ladies… WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?!?

Paint The Town Green–The Script

Dude, this song is my anthem right now… I have this things for Irish guys now…?

I know you’re missing home
It’s been so long since you’ve been
And that life you had in Dublin
Now ain’t nothing but a dream
To be right there in the moment
You’d give anything to be It’s alright
‘Cause tonight
We’re gonna paint the town green

Your friends are on the phone there
It’s so close to Paddy’s Day
And it kills you not to be there
But life got in the way
If I had to break the bank
Spend every penny on your dreams

It’s alright
‘Cause tonight
We’re gonna paint the town green

Just like home
Let’s color the streets like our own
Let’s make this place feel like our own
It’s just you and me

It’s alright
‘Cause tonight
We’re gonna paint the town green

And we travel on the subway
Like it was the Luas line
Chase the Hudson to the Liffey
Where we kissed for the first time
Turn the city into Dublin
Yeah, wherever we may be

It’s alright
‘Cause tonight
We’re gonna paint the town green

Just like home
Let’s color the streets like our own
Let’s make this place feel like our own
It’s just you and me,

It’s alright
‘Cause tonight
We’re gonna paint the town green

Just like home
Let’s color the streets like our own
Let’s make this place feel like our own
It’s just you and me,

It’s alright
‘Cause tonight
We’re gonna paint the town green

Paint the town green
Paint the town green

Night of Worship

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Wow. Way to make me feel like a jerk. Yesterday I didn’t really want to go to church at all, but then we ended up having the most amazing service ever, so now I feel horrible… *sobbing* Last night was sooo beautiful!! I mean, I’m sure you can tell that from the picture, which is actually from last night. Everyone was hugging and crying and singing–it was a beautiful night. A beautiful Night of Worship. I wish people would take evry single church service as seriously as they did last night.

I’m Such A Mess Today

I am such a mess today… I’m all blaring my music and not brushing my teeth. I took a shower, but I just shoved my hair in a ponytail, only my hair is so short that it’s hanging all over the place. My Leadership shirt has a hole in the back for some reason. (I blame my brother and pencils.) Aaaand now I just saw on Instagram that it’s Night of Worship at impact tonight, which means that it’s going to be packed with people. And baptisms too. I’m not really in the mood today. That sounds bad, that I’m not in the mood for church. I’m kinda mad tho. Yesterday we went on a school tour for this awesome charter school and I loved it! It was so awesome, and it’s supposed to be really, really hard. They have to take 6 AP classes before graduation and they’re at least two grades higher than public school curriculums. I want something really challenging and different. So i was all excited, right? And then at the very end of the tour, the guy says, “But we don’t accept anyone after eighth grade…”

CRAPOLA! Crushed my poor little heart forever… It just sucks because nothing ever works out for me, school-wise. My school in fourth grade closed, then SACS was too expensive, I didn’t get into Health Careers, this place won’t accept after middle school, and to top if off, I literally cannot go to a public school. Isn’t that stupid? Since I’m homeschooled and don’t have records, I’d have to restart all of high school to go to public school.

So i’m kind of upset and crying all day yesterday and life really sucks, and I have to leave for church now… Anyway, I need to suck it up. Byyyyeee. *waves*

Sometimes ( Insight of a Soul )

Originally posted on Syl65's Blog:

Sometimes, I get this churning in my stomach

like a volcano awakening

Sometimes, I want to swing my fists at the air

until my arms are weary

Sometimes, I want to laugh and feel joy

run relentlessly through me

Sometimes, I want to cry until

all my frustration is released

Sometimes, I look in the mirror

and wonder, is this who I’m suppose to be?

Sometimes, I want to get up and walk away

never to be seen

Sometimes, I tell God, that everything

is getting to me

Sometimes, I rewrite the human language

laced with profanities

The majority of the time, I am thanking God

for giving me the strength and for his understanding

photo credit: becuo.com

Hooded man walking

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Leave The Light On

I’ve seen myself with a dirty face
I cut my luck with a dirty ace
I leave the light on
I leave the light on

Daddy ain’t that bad he just plays rough
I ain’t that scarred when I’m covered up
I leave the light on

Little girl hiding underneath the bed
Was it something I did must be something I said
I leave the light on
Better leave the light on

I wanna love I wanna live
I don’t know much about it I never did

17 and I’m all messed up inside
I cut myself just to feel alive
I leave the light on

21 on the run on the run on the run from myself
From myself and everyone
I leave the light on
I leave the light on
Better leave the light on

Cause I wanna love I wanna live
I don’t know much about it I never did
I don’t know what to do
Can the damage be undone
I swore to God I’d never be what I’ve become

Lucky stars and fairytales
I’m gonna bathe myself in a wishing well
Pretty scars from cigarettes I never will forget
I never will forget

I’m still afraid to be alone
Wish that the moon would follow me home
I leave the light on

I ain’t that bad I’m just messed up
I ain’t that sad but I’m sad enough

Cause I wanna love I wanna live
I don’t know much about it I never did
I don’t know what to do
Can the damage be undone
I swore to God I’d never be what I’ve become

God bless the child with the dirty face
Who cuts her luck with a dirty ace
She leaves the light on
I leave that light on

#127 Solidary Rain

Originally posted on Read these lines. They already read you. :

Today’s rain has saved my tears from loneliness.

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